Latest experiences

[T.I. Vico]

So it's been a lot since I last posted here so I'm gonna tell a little about what has happened to me lately.

I've been unemployed for the last half a year and haven't payed my rent since then. I had some awuful torture days, but the last month was a bit better. I've also had some fake heart attacks. I live with three dickheads that all they do is piss me off. I have also found out that one of my old friends from my native town is also being gang stalked.

All of my senses are messed up. I can hardly feel any smell. I can see everything as through the screen of a camera with motion detection. I can hear infrasounds. My sense of touch is also messed up. I can't even feel the environmental temperature as I should. I've banged my head really hard against the wardrobe door (which is fairly thick) a couple of times and I hardly felt anything at all.

I'm having tinnitus 24/7 and I can also hear sometimes some sort of metallic sounds coming from withing my skull (these are even worse than tinnitus).

Things I've noticed. Because of their constant assaults with electromagnetic waves on me, energy accumulates either on the top of my head or on my chest (or both). When I rub these parts I can feel as if I tried to clean the dust off of an old TV screen with my bare hand (if anyone knows what's that like).

Things that help: head excercises, concentrating on my blinking, breething deeply, burning my palm with a cigarette, covering my ears, qigong.

I have to trust my principles and my logic, because they're really messing up with my feelings. As such, my empathy has decreased and my thirst for revenge is continuously increasing. When I think of the things that have happened this last year I can hardly feel anything at all. I can feel that each day I'm becoming less human. This is clearly a military experiment. They want to create mind controlled hypervigilent war machines.

[Sue]

Good to hear from you loan, its been a while.

It sounds like theyre desensitizing your empathy. Dont feel guilty about this. Their tech is so sophisticated they can completely alter your natural feelings and behaviours.

I always have to examine my thoughts/feelings because I dont know what they are implanting. They even at one point tried to convince me my dad sold me and sexually abused me. I began to have feelings it was true but then I somehow came to my senses. They did this because I loved my dad so much, they wanted me to believe he hated me.

Yes this is continual psychological warfare.

[T.I. Vico]

I forgot to add that a fan might also be useful (but I don't have the money to buy one now). I'm saying this because bursts of wind can really alleviate their effects on me. Air conditioners are not good because they emit a lot of infrasounds...

[T.I. Vico]

Yes Sue. That's what they're trying to do. When one of my roomates (or anyone else) pisses me off, they immidiately hit me with electromagnetic waves to increase my anger (at out of proportion levels). I can feel my heart as heavy as a stone and I usually have  to hurt myself in order no to hurt anyone else. But they also have to use certain thought like "why am I not let alone" or "how could anybody else do this to me" for this to work with maximum efficiency. The resulting effect is a mix of anger and despair.

[Sue]

Try physical activity loan....cardio to release frustrations and make you tired so youre less reactive.

[T.I. Vico]

I can't do a lot of physical activity because I have a lot of palpitations when I try to do so. It must be something pre-programmed because my heart starts beating wildly when I try to run or do other physical activity that requires a lot of energy...

[T.I. Vico]

Plus, most of the time I'm not fully conscious (half-hypnotized).

[Sandy Lomax]

Hi Ioan - nice to see you here again.

Sorry to hear about the problems. But you sound very clear and intelligent, not at all "half-hypnotised"!

I usually find I feel much better when I go out in the fresh air, even if it`s just to a park or shopping.

I get angry, but I try to think of the future when we will be free, and I hope and pray for that.

[T.I. Vico]

Hi Sandy. Good advice. The thing is my sense of smell has diminished greatly. So I can't enjoy going out in the fresh air the same way as before this started.

The thing is, they control everything about me. That means both my mood and my thoughts. So if I try to think of nice things, they'll change my mood (and thus my thoughts), and if I try to just be optimistic, they'll bombard me with pessimistic thoughts.

[T.I. Vico]

Because of this, I feel everything about me is fragmented. For example I feel like thoughts, feelings, sensations etc. are independent of each other and are not connected in any way.

[Indie Target]

"I can't even feel the environmental temperature as I should."

That sounds a lot like me when I was hit hard at the beginning of my overt harassment, and it was most likely caused by drugs they put on my food and/or drinking water, methadone or something similar. I looked up the symptoms on the internet and they fit. Back then I was in a dreamy or "lightheaded" state, too, and again some drugs would easily explain that.