The pain to the head is thunderous, to the very top of my head and my hand burns over the site. I'm terribly ill-fitted for this world in this condition, though I've decided to spend not so much time alone. A male friend of mine suggested this to me, as a way of helping my mental condition, to be around others, to not isolate. I'm still sending emails ever so often to human rights orgs., and this is my only form of activism. It is my strong belief that we need these people to represent us as a disadvantaged group who suffer and remain kept in the shadows. I'm not looking for government to help at all. I'm frightened many times during the awful pain, very paranoid over every sound around me. I'm uncertain how long this will go on, but I wonder about death coming.