I will do the best I can to write what I still can. I can't go online as much now. Every attempt to borrow a PC is an excuse for them to attack me. They accuse me of everything imaginable so they can justify not allowing me to use the computer. I am risking it though. I need to let snippets of the truth come out before they can eliminate me and they cover the cause of the death up.
1. Four or so days ago, I started writing about what I realized.
The people working for us - the all-around assistant (cook, secretary, accountant, etc), the laundrywomen, gardener, etc... who come from one family alone.. are directly connected to the NPA mistress who threatened my father she'd have her kins and barrio-folks attack his family more than two decade ago.
The uncle is the NPA mistress's best friend (he used to work with the laundrywoman but when his attacks became too obvious, he was asked not to come first by his sister (the laundrywoman). Their style has always been that way, it's a recurrent habit. They let the tension simmer then they attack again.
Days ago, when I asked about my father's mistress - why they know her (I never asked about such stuff before, only when I pieced together the pieces did I start asking) - the all-around assistant/trustee (the daughter) said: we are from the same barrio, i think my mother is her classmate.
Just days ago, it hit me that the puzzles I could not get an answer to before converged at a certain point: the time the NPA mistress and her family threatened they will attack my father and his family.
The classmate in 1st year who became a very close friend (who I found later was the one spreading stories to destroy me) was such a puzzle for me. We didn't have any issue before I realized she was betraying me. Up till the point I discovered some of what she was doing (After several years of trying to dismiss the obvious. I trusted her too much.)
it was but lately I allowed myself to process it, when I realized how undeniably connected to my perps she has been - back in first year high school, she kept talking about an aunt very close to her - her favorite aunt - an NPA rebel.
I realized just lately, after I allowed myself to finally ask about my father's dalliances (before I tried to not know anything about their issues more so that when my mother is beset by anger with my father, it's me she lashes at frequently) - the time she became my classmate was but months after my father had a relationship with the NPA mistress (I was only told about it years later, when the threats escalated.When the mistress demanded my father leave his family or else she'd destroy us).
Her NPA aunt was in the same area as my father's NPA mistress was. At the same period of time (before the NPA mistress went down the mountains).
That apparently was also the period, the people still now here, started working for us.
2.There are scattered snippets of what I have been undergoing in different journals that I wrote. I have been sealing my things knowing now that the people I used to trust, the people in this house, are involved. I have written everything because I now realize one thing. I thought my parent was but being a mean parent when as a child she would attack me with words like : "You are too quiet. That's what crazy people do." or "Intelligent people who are too quiet will end up crazy", etc...
As a child, I wondered how she could be so mean as to label me that just because she said I am intelligent or that I keep to myself (with people who keep tearing you down, will you still share your ideas knowing that every time you do it, it will another thread to be twisted and to attack you with?)
It has escalated in so many and extreme proportions , me not saying anything about everything I've gone through as a child, trying to protect them from malicious tongues (I know how it feels like to be torn down in pieces with words every time. As a child, it was a firm resolve I had not to utter anything if it would not be a good word at all. That's why it took me so long to finally make a stand. I had to see my life in tatters , my reputation become non-existent, me become a mother before I finally decided I should speak up... otherwise I will die with the truth buried with me.)
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I have seen too that my searches have been redirected and I am being spoofed pages the info of which the perps have full control over. It would be time-consuming if I still decipher if the Peacepink Pages I am served every time come from the real site or if it's on a sandbox that will just disappear later or is hidden from the real world (this is one of their curtains, this is one of the means they block off a target).
Witth limited means now though (my laptops have been tinkered with, destroyed, my cellphones were tampered with as well. I don't have any means but the PCs they allow me to use which is full of spy apps they have set up. I can no longer secure it every time I manage to use any since I do not have that much time left judging from how they have escalated their attacks. I have to make do with as much as I can with the little I have left since as I mentioned every attempt to use a PC is an excuse for them to attack me and accuse me of stuff they themselves made , a chance to provoke me so they can make it look like I'm the one out of my mind, not them.
I know too that PEACEPINK members, most of them are with them. They actually just feed me back what's happening here. Most likely these are NGO people trying to ask for donations supposedly for me but no, the help does not reach me at all, that's not true, (I do not even have money to leave now). They will only prolong the drama, if at all, to continue milking it for the funds they will be able to raise supposedly to help the "victims".
We need to filter everything we read here. Most of them are meant to bamboozle us with info meant to divert. Half truths that would acknowledge our issues but giving us solutions that will actually aggravate the situation.
I am not saying everyone, I hope not. But real victims would know what I am talking about. Most of the habitues here are actually perps waiting for the sheeps to seek solace amongst fellow victims. As it is with offline life, they need to make sure they can isolate us. Worse, online, they can milk the drama and even make money off it. And that serves them a lot of selfish purpose. If not caught, that's a lot of money for a seemingly good cause (which will not reach the victims at all) , and if caught, it will be a stigma for people who really want to help victims - they'll stay away from victims , trying to protect themselves from scams actually done by perps.
Paul, thanks for that but you don't see the situation. You don't know how steadfast I have been throughout all these. I am writing not because I am afraid but because I am staring death right in its face. I am almost near the answer to my questions now: why i am being harassed, my existence, the secrets this community are hiding. I thought it was but ordinary stalking I went through for more than a decade. It's deeper than that. I will do as much as I can to write it in detail here and if not allowed , on paper.
Suffice it to say, this town is hiding something they wouldn't want the world to see and core to it is my existence.
You see I have managed to leave this place several times but their tentacles are all over. I realized this the last year. Over a year, I have tried leaving 3 or more times even without money (they try their best to cripple me on this. I had to go to churches in places I have never reached just so I could make sure my child is secure but I can't do that now. The last time I realized the church I went to had already been "prepared" for me. They have already profiled how I'd look for a refuge, they made sure the ones I'd go to are their people as well.
Truth now,
Hello. I have had many death threats over the years. There were times I was tortured horribly because I disobeyed the perps. Take heart in the fact that I am still alive, and so are you. Dr. Robert Duncan stated that, ' They are using humans as guinea pigs. They need us alive because they can't do experiemnts on a dead guinea pig.' It makes sense. They need us alive. Thats not to say they dont take life, but I dont think it is their main concern at all. I would suggest you keep trying to get to a computer and associate with peacepink members. Especially take in as much information as you can. Knowledge is power, so take it in.
Take care!