From what I get hit with it, the only real sense of relief comes from a hot shower running over my head, and for the first 2 to 3 minutes, its like heaven, to be released from the crippling pain.I'm in a series of hard days, today is no different, with electric headache to the very top of my head that goes deep inside and energy over me, waves of it come on and off like someone has hit me over the head and I will pass out. Then I get laser induced plasma too.I'm losing this war I feel, because when the pain gets unbearable I drink alcohol and its now become an addiction. They have been hitting me for the past year and half just about constantly, every day, I don't feel I can take anymore.There is no end in sight, I feel the end is going to mean death. I continue to write my poems as an outlet and to spread the word. Its a terrible existence.
Faith is the bird that feels the light and sings while the dawn is still dark. I know pain as well dear one. Please know that this too shall pass! I can only imagine what the rewards will be for one brave soul who faced the pain with an equal amount of courage and positive fortitude... Please be well sweet child.. and know that you are loved and heard!
I forgot to also mention that I have a bad rash all over and around my neck. I think this is from the radiation, as I never get things like this, and it itches as well.
Comments