As I get further and further through this experience, I learn more and more...
At the beginning, I didn't understand what was happening...then over time, I realized what they were doing and hated them with everything inside of me, and now I truly feel sorry for them. It is a shameful act of betrayal and selfishness on all humanity -- those responsible have acted out for one of the greatest injustices ever...
I have realized over time that those responsible WANT you to hate them...they want you to be mad, they want you to beg for them to stop...They want more than anything for you to be miserable, to have regret...because they will have a lifetime of regret for doing this -- even if they aren't able to stop lying to themselves at the moment...
I refuse to yell at my perp...to even get angered. It takes a great deal of strength, but over time...I have been able to simply remain calm. It drives them crazy...I refuse to get mad at my perp...I tell him that he has been told YES far too many times in life...that I will be telling him NO for the rest of my life...
I truly feel sorry for my perp. I often ask him whether or not life was better before he was introduced to this technology? It clearly was...whether or not he admits it. His birthday recently passed, and I asked him if his life was better before he became a stalker, torturer, and someone who is blatantly OBSESSED with another persons life, or now? Although he refuses to answer my questions, I think it is safe to say that life was better for him (and those involved all over) before they fell into this trap...My perp cannot make it through the night without trying to wake me, induce dreams, etc...I tell him that he might have a slighhhttttt addiction. If you can't go a week, or days, or hours, or minutes, let alone seconds, without something -- you are trapped. I remind him that the longer he goes, the more and more regret he is going to have. He doesn't care -- it is all about feeding his addiction. You can only solve a problem that you recognize exists, and admitting you have a problem is the first step that he doesn't have the courage to take.
The saddest part is that he must know, by now...that he fell for the trap that those above him set. He made the mistake of believing that the least trust worthy people on the planet (who BELIEVE in torturing random, innocent people for entertainment) had HIS best interests at heart...
HOW SAD. I remind him that he is a negative, hateful, vindictive person who is arrogant beyond belief and that is exactly the type of person that these monsters would recruit...
The fact that he thinks he is special made him that much more vulnerable...he must have thought "these people believe in torturing innocent people at random, but they care about me...they are letting me in on their game..." He is an idiot, he is just as much a part of the game as we are -- he is simply too dumb to admit it.
I often ask him if this is how he pictured his life going when he was younger? I can't imagine that when he was younger he pictured becoming a torturing psychopath who at the very least STALKS people everyday. Obviously this isn't even comparable to stalking someone, but Ill leave it at that...Those who carry this out on others believe that because it is EXCLUSIVE, that it is something to be proud of...I often laugh at my perp and remind him of what I am doing, for instance...if I am watching a movie, Ill say "you're listening to someone watch a movie, this is sooooo exclusive, why the hell would anyone want to stalk someone watching a movie...this is the most pathetic thing ever"...
He doesn't have a response to that, because there isn't one...This is so far past pathetic, theres nothing to say...
The monsters who do this are such lost, confused souls I feel sorry for them. They were convinced that what they had wasn't enough -- friends, family, their humanity. Obviously you would have to be a terrible excuse for a person to do this in the first place, but even if they didn't care about others, I choose not to believe that they HATED their friends, their family -- that they had no humanity whatsoever...They were convinced that their lives weren't enough and NOW, they will never have enough...They literally were tricked into believing that they were too good for their own lives...How could you possibly fall for that?
Their logic is that someone else LOSING, means that they are WINNING...Life doesn't have a scoreboard, I am not competing against the person torturing me, any more so I am competing against any of you...Life is about bettering yourself, and continuing to grow and improve yourself and helping others -- not others failing. There does not have to be a loser and a winner in life; there can be ALL winners, and that is what they don't understand.
Basing your happiness around a single thing or person is an awful idea...and yet the person doing this to me based his sense of happiness on MY unhappiness and pain...and that was a terrible mistake. I am not an unhappy person...He won't get that satisfaction from me...Other people being happy should bring you happiness yourself -- if it doesn't, and you cannot stand others enjoying themselves...there is something terribly wrong with you -- I remind my perp of that.
I also remind my perp that he is never going to get enough of this...He went from having his own life to creating and accepting an addiction that he cannot go seconds without...he thought that I would simply be entertainment for him and then kill myself when he got bored with me?
THAT WONT BE HAPPENING. He actually thought that I would give up my life for a few hours, or days of HIS enjoyment...and then he would move on to another person? I have respect for humanity -- for my friends and family. I believe that others letting you in their lives is a privilege...I will shield whoever was going to be "next" from that pain...They will never know what was going to happen to them, and they won't ever have to thank me...that is simply my duty as a human being.
The saddest part for my perp is that he must KNOW by now that even me ending my life wouldn't satisfy him...sure, he would enjoy it and it would be a fleeting few minutes, or hours, or maybe even days that he was proud of himself for. But then he would have to move on to another...he would have his fun with them, and then the same thing would happen -- he would get bored, and hopefully get his way and move on. This is a never ending cycle that I am putting a STOP to.
THIS WONT GO PAST ME...PICKING ME WILL PROVE TO HAVE BEEN A TERRIBLE DECISION.
I read a quote that 'you should never accept NO from someone who didn't have the authority to say YES'. I would never have asked my perp for approval to love life before he did this to me, and I won't accept him telling me that I won't enjoy it now. It is not up to him -- it is quite simply, not his decision...No matter what is done to you in life, your happiness is ultimately up to YOU. That is something you should never forget.
Replies
I agree! We need to see where we can take the lead in being peaceable. Things like getting rid of firearms will eliminate the likely hood the perps will cause us to use a gun on someone or ourselves. Non-violence is always the answer!
Nick said:
Nick, now you are getting somewhere.! Just dont forget the human element...they like to take part, SOMETIMES> but, not all the time.
Humans have been building computers for 60 years. They have been playing with ELf waves for that long too. Most of the advanced stuff is done behind closed doors, so we dont see it. WEll, we do, as TIs, but not really. We only see enough to come up with creative, imaginative ideas. WEll, we need to get together and see... Yes, they have developed weak AI. Do you know what weak AI is? It is in comparison to Strong AI, which I dont think exists yet. But, the weak AI can do many things. And computing power is most likely now quantum in nature. SO the abiltiy to process all those thoughts people have is easy. have you studied these things at all? I would give you some more sites if you would read them. For the most part, you have come a long way. I mean, it took me years to understand much of this stuff even with the perps force feeding me. SO, I hope to help you understand some things with the hope that YOU will in turn, help save humanity. I want to do it myself, but I am disabled. I need a person who understands things as they are. and who is willing to learn to communicate it to the world.
Its AI, monitored and programmed by humans, no question about it.
Serious business in training AI and advancing synthetic telepathy, not a next door kids playing with computer, neither an office building with few thousands employees and phone lines to thousands targets to talk with all day. :)
Imagine every square inch of the planet is covered by invisible waves that are circulated by computer, the waves have access to every brain on the planet, AI is controlling the computer.
Nick said:
Nick, first, Yes I think some can. AND it may not be their choice. The bosses likely say," Hey, wanna see something real cool? Check this out...", Then they show them that they can set them up as a perp, BUT...the boss says,"Now. If you want that rush again, you need to fit certain criteria. FOr instance. WE have certain plans for this person, so we need to introduce another perp as well. This means you will share time with this other person. If you want the RUSH, you need to follow the RULES. YOU SHARE TIME!"
SO, you see, it is up to the BOSS as to how much time a directly connected perp will have with a TI, IF at ALL. I mean, I think it is most often AI. AND,It is up to the BOSS as to how many perps will attack one Target. They also decide if you hear ONE voice...or many.
When it comes to painkillers not stopping the pain BECAUSE THE PERPS CAUSE IT... I agree. That was the point. The pain pills didnt stop the pain ,and the alcohol on top of it didnt stop the pain ,because the pain was being cause dby a machine, not the same as what the painkillers treated. Just as the psych meds dont stop MACHINE PRODUCED v2k. so, we agree.
TO the last point...I feel your pain. I tried to give it up, but they said," WE dont believe you. WE need to make you say it another way." SO they continued for another year and a half. SO you see why violent response isnt logical? They can see every thought, and thus every move we would make toword a weapon. This means ...Get this....That When Aaron Alexis killed those Navy workers, he killed innocent bystanders, because if it was perps, they would have seen him coming before he even knew it himself.
Carrin, I 100% know my perp is doing this for the thrill, he is clearly a psychopath as is everyone involved in this game. I have not argued that...but your point about not having a conscience, I disagree. Psychopaths have consciences just like everyone else, they just choose to ignore it. Think about it, if someone didn't have a concept of right vs. wrong, why would they get a THRILL out of doing what is wrong...they simply wouldn't be able to comprehend the difference and likely wouldn't gravitate to the terrible option...they just are better at lying to themselves than other people...they think they are special
I know my perp doesn't think of what he is doing as stalking, but it is. He would think someone else was a pathetic excuse for a human if they did this to him, yet he does it to OTHERS. I remind him he tries to make himself out to be a badass who is in the know, yet is addicted to someone else's life -- clearly he isn't very happy.
You are correct though, he not only doesn't mind that I don't like him. He wants me to HATE him, that is the game for him. The monsters who do this get the ultimate pleasure out of being hated by some, and not known by most. They want this double life...I am not sure on him being paid or not -- as with any job, no matter how lucrative, the workday ends at some point. He never stops. He wakes up at 4 am to do this to me, and does it from the second he gets up to the second he falls asleep. If this is "work", do you know a single person in the world who works 24/7, even if they LOVE or are addicted to their job? Very unlikely.
Al, you say that you believe that is AI, and that you and I and others, are very likely experiencing AI all day everyday? If its AI, and can appear to be many people at the same time, why would EVER experience a real human? I wouldn't pay someone to do something I could have a computer do for free...why would they? Makes no sense, logically.
Some believe that there are many, many people involved in your torture, as even you stated that there were 2 people a shift for years doing this to you...if AI can do the same thing, why would there ever be people...I think it makes way more sense that it is either 100% AI, or 100% real people...I believe it is actual people...
Another reason why (even if there is AI), I don't believe that I am experiencing that is because I have been experiencing this for a long time, and haven't heard the same things over and over ever. My perp goes through the same games, the same things to plant as my thoughts, etc...but never saying the same sentence over and over and over again, which a computer would do. There would be no reason not to, it would simply fuck with the victim, which is what this game is all about...I also understand that you get "vibrations", while others believe that they experience pain, are given illnesses, etc...I don't believe in this either. I have felt pain before but it is simply your brain tricking yourself (or rather them) tricking you into thinking that you are going through such emotional/ mental pain that you can actually feel it. Whenever my perp tries to induce a headache or give me pain in my head, I laugh at him and tell him "if you have this power, then make my hand hurt, make my leg hurt...prove it to me"...He CANNOT do it.
You say you've been deceived and thus don't think I know? What do you mean? I 100% don't know what is happening, as neither do you...or we would've solved it. How did you believe you were working for the queen of england or president?
I believe that it is actual people, as again it makes no sense to have people doing the work a computer can do. You believe that they were involved at one point and perhaps others, but not any more? That doesn't add up...I think that they want you to believe that it is a machine, and that it will never stop...as that is a tougher pill to swallow to than thinking that it is a person and you are taking up their time, and thus they cannot do this to someone else while doing it to you
Nick, as to what I currently go through, for about the last three years I hear one male voice very far off in the distance. It is always the same personality too. I get vibrations to my body, usually my anus, but it moves around to my ankles, chest, head. Iused ot get EXTRME sounds, and v2k. I used to get many different types of thought manipulation. They would blank out my thoughts, and insert their own. They would tell me my thoughts seconds before I realized I was having them. They used to run three 8 hour shifts a day with at least two persp per shift. I believe at that time they were all human. They did however use the AI often. They would run the AI for hours some times where ALL i hear was the same phrase over and over. They would make special effects with the machine. They made me believe things also, Like that I worked for the queen of england and the president by creating elaborate skits while using their voices through v2k. I know what it means to be deceived so pardon me if I question the idea that you know. On the other hand, I know what it is like to have real people involved as you would read in my story. But, if it is really the guy you know...you choose how to respond. I think non-violence is the answer. And looking at the big picture helps.
Do you think that they have the technology to decide "Ill pick some random person, very far away from me and instantly listen to their thoughts"? That wouldn't be technology, it would be magic -- Magic doesn't exist, even in shows, it is just an illusion. This game they play is the same...We can't explain it now, but it will one day be explained, and we will realize (I believe) that is is not as crazy as we all think.
If they had the ability to do that, do you really think they'd pick us, they'd chose this life? If you essentially had magic, they'd have no reason to be depressed, to hate the world, etc...If they had the ability to listen to everyone thoughts whenever they wanted, at random, they could just play the stock market, or bet on sports and be the richest people on the planet...even if people are paid great sums to do this, they wouldn't do it if they thought they had ENOUGH. This technology they've been introduced to conned them into permanently being empty, because they have seen how fulfilled others can be despite this, and they failed without interference...
Quite frankly, if they had the ability to do that, they wouldn't be what they are...they would simply use that power to be happy.
You believe that everyone is being used, or surveilled, and only a small group experiencing v2k, correct?
I agree with you that many more are being manipulated than they think, and only a certain group of people are actually made aware of their situation...I fully believe that v2k is simply for the perps enjoyment, as quite frankly, doing whatever they did to me and then not telling me...I was 10000000x more vulnerable -- I did things I wouldn't even consider today. None wildly crazy, but still things that I wouldn't think twice about now. If my perp (or as you believe, perps) had the strength to shut his mouth, he would've gotten way more out of this.
I however, disagree with you and think that a very small percentage of the overall population is experiencing what we are -- and though I don't believe in chips or implants, I do 100% believe that you came in contact with your perp at some point, whether or not you are aware of it. This happened to me after being unconscious...I don't believe they have the ability to simply pluck random people to listen to their thoughts, that is simply not possible. Also, if they did, why would they pick us? Like Ive stated, there are much smarter, and rational people to choose from (aka it would make a lot more sense to pick some CEO's brain, or an inventor, etc...I am neither, just a regular person).
I think that you thinking that certain people you come across saying certain things to you to get a reaction, and then the perps moving along without that person ever knowing doesn't add up...As even you said, why would they use another person to get to you when they can get to you directly? There is no need...if they can make you think certain things without interference, why would they go to the trouble of using another person to say some specific thing to get a reaction, if they can get it without doing anything.
I understand the IT- hackers observation, but quite frankly a hacker can beat the system. In a computer, the hacker can outsmart it, break the code, etc...Im sorry to say, but I or you very likely not be solving this problem by simply thinking about it. I think a very, very, very small percentage of humans have the mental capacity to create technology like this, and even they must have done it with teams and teams of people, and absurd amounts of funding...I am not one of them. I am very strong mentally and have the ability to think critically about important things and process information in ways others may overlook, but I am not some genius with an IQ of 140...