You can't watch the tv or radio without getting harassed to some extent and going out too . I have found some positive digital songs to try to cheer me up.

I realized i am being a spoiled brat while in the hospital, I am trying to change but everything I do they seem to mostly dislike.  I am also now seeing a psychotherapist.... The lack of not being able to distract yourself is very hard.

So what does everyone do for fun? I like walking my dog and looking at nature in my…

   I recently got out of the hospital(suicide attempt)  I ate at a quiet place and was fine but still had great apathy, suicidal thoughts, and messed up thoughts that they planted But for the most part i was able to have a normal conversation.

 Also noticed a street theatre bit while walking with my parents where someone shouted something along the lines of "you are a loser" which was "supposedly" directed to someone else.....  I did not mind dying at all yesterday and my social…

I am trying to find peace but the moment i try to distract myself everything I do  seems on the news or listening to music shows what i am thinking or my behaviors What is this? I do hate god for this but i am trying to find strength in prayer and believing again, but the devil seems to interject or they are placing strange thoughts in my head then they being two weeks of sleep deprivation, hermitisim, with only one good night rest has only made me mentally worst. 

Unfortunately I was…

They let me find this, haven't read it yet seems to be in great detail hope they don't mess with the link

It has been 3 years since my big event which has led them to stalking. Although looking back my whole life might have been orchestrated, since I had two small holes located next to my left and right ear from the day I was born, which might have been implants.

I was shy and quiet bullied in school, and always had problems expressing how I feel,I had my first nervous breakdown at a game store where I did not know I was actually talking out loud....  there was this other time when I…