For many years I did something called, "Shadow Stabbing." I would blame certain parties for the disturbances I endured, mostly sexual, being stalked and yelled at, along with a breakdown of my language abilities and emotions. Anyway, many people place blame on what they know, a known enemy, like a Turk, like a Jew, raw fear, and the perps enjoy this and find humor in it. Guess again.  Oh, we're so stupid and paranoid.  I wonder why.  We're helpless and these people are sick.

Now I am schizophrenic, and I've been hospitalized 20 times.  The difference between schizophrenia and psychotronic warfare is that when you're schizophrenic, your delusions are bizarre and have no logic.  I believed they were releasing dead people from the elevators at night, that reptiles were controlling my mind (this is common, and I don't think it can be entirely dismissed, though it is a peasant belief nonetheless; I know I am but yeah), etc.  I try to distance myself from illogical beliefs and so should you.  Don't fall for "Shadow Stabbing."  Saying that the government is after you is not totally illogical, as it has been after many people, especially undesirables, which, if you're reading this, you probably are.  Remember Nazi Germany or Stalin's purges. Who did they go after?  We have them, too, purges, we just hide them.  Nothing like a death in June.  It's hunting time then.  I don't get a lot of air conditioning in June. Well, whatever.   Nobody cares.

If you want to see an example of the agenda they are pushing, watch Love and Death's "The Abandoning" on youtube.  There are several others, but it takes a while to open the mind.  The doctors will ignore you.  I only go there to get drugged after an attack or if I am filled with strange sensations, which is from the lobotomy I received.  It's a waste of money, I know, but I've given up being heard by respectable members of society and just tell them to knock me out until it's over.  I like going to Fayetteville.  I receive beef once a week.  My wasted life isn't without some pleasures.

Now I'm a polite schizophrenic. Don't immediately discredit me because they will hurt the deviants, of course. I had the disease before they messed with me, but since I'm useless, I get picked on like they have something to prove.  They did change my backthoughts and tried to reprogram me, which resulted in me splitting everywhere and going nutty.  I kind of had a 4D reality there for a while.  Reality can only be so many ways, and we react in patterns that are predictable and hard to change due to the nature of reality, as I said.  They think they can achieve world peace, or that's the lie they tell to the naive, but they don't want to fix the actual causes of poverty and crime, as it doesn't fit into their agenda or how they govern as a whole.  Sometimes you have to oppress people or burn them in the game.  If they're failing at the bottom, do you really want them to party hardy?  Stuff like that.  

Annoyance.  They also tried to make me a pedophile.  And world peace!  I'm not one, don't worry.  They don't have mind control down to an art yet.

Hi, my name is Kaela.  I'm not sure if it's a name I should keep.  They have harassed me several times, and my brain has suffered, been burned in the head.  Strange feeling..  People who knew me before say I'm completely different, like another person.  Several of my memories are missing, and people will try to fill me in.  

All and all, this is a very sensitive topic and needs to be vetted by professionals, not artists who bite the hook for fame.  It is incredibly personal and an assault on someone's future, on who they are.  We should use courts and have papers filed, evidence.  We don't need their "charity."  I don't like Sufism being abused, and I don't like Zoroastrianism/s black and white world for children.  

Clinics and court orders....

So, I've had a hard time with intelligence agencies messing with me along with a few snobby rich people.  They've tried to get me to commit suicide, fail at life and physically hurt me with mysterious "ailments."

I know I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, but I see something wrong with this picture.  See, lately, they've been reprogramming me.  They feed my backthoughts when I sleep and change the way I perceive the world.  I can barely fight back.  Heaven forbid they the right thing.  Why did they have to corner and torture me for months, years?  What were they trying to prove?

We're at war with kookiness.

I'm sure in the future, getting a brain check up will be as common as braces. 

It's no secret.  The government has trolled many establishments over the ages.  They've embraced eugenics.  They have mind control and other annoying programs, like cointelpro.

So far, they've gotten to many of the typical hits: welfare recipients, disabled, mentally ill people and the poor in general.  One might ask oneself what these people do in society.  I know the middle class likes to be brats and shove the poor into Hell (I did it to until I understood better), but what about the elites that control the system?  Do they need ice picks to manage themselves and our affairs?

Another problem we have is the culture of celebrity.  For fame, these people are willing to harm us, to stay in the clique, like Madonna (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSaFgAwnRSc guess what that is).  I understand she isn't behind all the operations.  She's their dirty rag in our face and an activist of world slavery. 

Her attitude is part of the problem.

Why are we being punished by them?  Why can't they do something logical and help humanity?  They're in it for themselves, as always.

They do the same thing to me over and over again:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-GsLh6dazI ; I like how after brain surgery, they do the same games, use the keywords, try to frame me, etc.  People shouldn't be treated like that.  Clinics.  This is a disorganized bunch of bananas.  They can't handle it.  So special.  Turn the music off and listen to reality.  Stop the drugs, too.  Your handlers are clever doing that.  You're a tool.

They've left me alone for the most part here recently.  I am destroyed. haha  The last time we spoke was over the Shakira thing.  They were bullying Shakira and had me paint such a lovely picture of her being old and a gold-digger.  And then I see the video, and I'm like, "How rude." Their technology has advanced in these past few years because they're slipping thoughts into my head, and I am not getting a headache nor feel detached from these new commands.   Prior, I was in an odd position where I was split off from myself, and I could say, "no" to them.  Now, that's more difficult.  I only know it when my environment starts to clash, or I do something weird.

I still pick up on their stupid cues.  I still do NOT want a husband, and I don't want a family.  Like I've told them many times, and they're  finally starting to respect me more, it's not going to happen.  They're the little editors of our civilization.  They'll "get it" eventually.   I think they sterilized me anyway.  I don't care.  I would never make a child live in my shame, nor would I want to give them schizophrenia.  Yes, I'm schizophrenic.  No, I'm not delusional all of the time.

I wish Putin would compensate me so that I could live in a nice house away from humans.  I hate humans.

It could do a mini-investigation into our cases and decide if we're targets of the mafia or something or delusional.  It could then put us on a list so that our families and bosses know that we aren't crazy.  A program like this would save resources and lives because we'd be able to fight back, pay taxes and lead productive lives instead of being labeled crazy, though some of us might have a combo going on, which would be more difficult to sort out but not impossible.

I don't remember committing treason anymore, but I know the song was written before that because I committed treason in 2009.  I was in "I Want to Believe" before that and that's what made me so paranoid because they were after me.  I think I wanted them to get it over with.  I went to the hospital, and they didn't believe that I was in the movie because they live in bubbles.

They have kooky issues, and they are terrible leaders. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bn3Yy0Y_m50 It's Kaela at 2:01, and I'm going to end him.  This was all setup.

Tell us the rules so that we can follow.  I want to kill myself like this.  I'd gladly get on the floor and worship as opposed to this.  IF that's what they want...  It's hard to think straight.  I can't remember things.  I simply react to stimulus.  I have no idea how to form an opinion or do anything.  I can't keep an opinion, I guess. I have no morals.  I can't reason.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nV76x4l79s Here is the song that advertises that one.

Have they erased any of your minds?  What do you struggle with?

I don't even vote.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhnhJ34Fnbc here's what I am.

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/two-men-accused-bizarre-radiation-plot-192422391.html

I've been targeted.  I attracted all sorts of gangsters in addition to my regular attackers.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately given my current and desperate situation.  I would let them enhance me if I thought they could. 

Would you let them?

So, if you're in the US, you know that the FBI frames a good deal of people.  It's comical.  It's almost as funny as their new technology that disrupts normal brain function.  What they're using on me now seems to be temporary because it'll shut off when I do other activities.

They're trying to train me to not write.  It isn't going to work.  I flip them off and do it anyway.  While my sentence structure becomes corrupted at times, or I use the wrong word, sitting down to write is actually easier.  Now I can write for days on end.  I have to outline more.

It's not like I ever get published anyway, nothing big, but they have decided, by God, I'm a target, and they're going to take care of it.  I just watch people rush around me on every side, getting ahead, so as usual, the FBI is accomplishing nothing.  Just like with the original COINTEL PRO, the black people triumphed.

They're using me as the only one they can control.  It gives them a false sense that they're doing something productive.

I was trying to write the other day and all of a sudden half of my body became numb.  I felt strange sensations occurring in the left hemisphere of my brain, and I was unable to recognize letters for a few minutes.  I felt really weak all of a sudden.

They said that I was "getting in on their good" by writing, which is a joke.  She said she couldn't damage my brain anymore, or I'd be retarded.  I think I am.

I think they like paying all my bills.  They tried to make me look developmentally disabled for my evaluation, but they failed that too.

They can't do anything right.

LOL Did you know that a truly retarded person managed to kill one of them, and he was given the death penalty, even though he was actually retarded?  They're morons.  They'll never get anywhere.

He is so crappy.

We need to put a few things into place if he's going to do "this," his master, kooky plan.

I challenge Putin a lot, mostly out of misled desperation, but at least he thought of what was going to happen to certain groups of people and created some safety nets.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5L5I_7r2lA  Putin's like, "I'll just say the truth!  Beat that! and here's a t-shirt, poor person."

Obama has made certain individuals really "special."  All they do is stalk and eat of us or, I guess, eat us for a living. 

I'm sorry, I've got power problems now.  I want to dominate. 

I don't feel good.

What do you think of Obama's leadership?  Are you confused and screwed?

They're free.

If you want to check them out, here they are: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/dawnofthehives.

In "Such Things Happen, But You Don't Care," I tell about my struggles with both schizophrenia and being a TI.

In "Dawn of the Hives," I put all their arguments together, the peoples' who were stalking me.  I created "their" world.  Oh, and I named myself 53, which is one of their numbers, and I made sure the damn thing had 13 chapters.

Does anyone else have any books about being a TI?

I understand the need to watch us.  I really get it, but I don't understand why they feel the need to transform us into paranoid schizophrenics.  I don't understand why there is no place for us to go to report this technology, and I do not understand why it is not publically discussed in a more reaching fashion.  Yes, you have people who will say that the government is controlling their thoughts or their actions when they aren't, but there has to be a process to sort them out.  If we have truly been targeted then there needs to be a list we can appear on so that our bosses and stuff know that sometimes people will try funny business.

I can't breathe.  I don't know if they've used me to the maximum potential or if they'll come back for more.

I'll put a video camera in my house if so desired, but if it's wanted, don't be surprised when I change clothes.  They act like every little thing is a big deal when most of us aren't capable of much, even if we are dissidents.

Why not come forward and say that you're in our minds and then try to help people with it or solve crimes or anything else?  Why are they hiding in the dark?  What do they have to conceal?

Kooky plans...

A lot of times, people rush into my life and try to change its course.  I realize they think they know what they're doing, but it ends up taking me in some horrible directions. 

The psychotronic people try to program "family" among other things.  Rose died.  I don't want to.  While I'm eternally trying to screw the man over, I'm also deeply ashamed of my defects as a human being and don't want to bring another person into this world to suffer as I have as fair as that was.  I don't have faith that it'll get better, and I don't want it to get worse.  I seem to be eternally trapped while everyone else is living it up.  I don't want to be a refugee.

Now, as much as I'd love to be chained to our worthless system with offspring that they will threaten to kill to get me to do even stupider things, the thing would end up homeless after I lose my job for having it because this happens when I work.  There is no maternity leave, and they don't like pregnant females.  I usually end up getting partnered with a bum as well, because I am, of course, the most worthless human being on the planet and deserve to eat dirt with Joe the Hobo.  Joe and I would get along with people would leave us alone maybe, but they have issues with Joe's age and other things.  It's only okay so long as I'm getting massively screwed over to the maximum potential.

I will admit that after having tapes of Putin played in my head and crawling along the floor to his machines and under his AK47 that a special spark lit in my heart that made me a little insane, like Medea, and I still cackle to this day because I'm glued.  Not because I want him, no, heaven forbid that be granted, but because I seem to seek the worth I lost from him, someplace misplaced approval and how dare you ignore all that.

It happened.  My life is in a massive pit, and I want out of here.  I need something to happen with the brain as well.  This stinks.

I'm bored. You?

Why would I lay there? I valued something.  I'll never value anything again.  Do whatever you want to.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ODH-EhDfuKE

So I did not know that. 

Since they messed me up, I can't bond like a normal person, so I didn't care as much.

They've made me into a criminal.  Here me ROAR! The worst thing they can do to me for my crime is prison and even that's a stretch, but they've made everything ambiguous and really tried to force me to talk to people "outside of the US" so that they could really get me.

You know, I wondered why I kept ending up in so many high profile places.  No, not physically, but me.  They're using me for their careers.

In boring land, all they do is go get my security clearance, rip it up then it's on to the next one.  Not as exciting as what the others tried, these agents.

Well, back to Mario.  I'm thinking of collaborating with the enemy again, but I just want to fuck him.  Love they enemy! Putin is hot.  Hey, I used to be attractive, before they did "this" so don't even.  Think of me when I was alive!

In schizophrenic news, and yes I have both, there was a man floating outside of my window earlier.  That means my brain is not in good shape.

Thanks guys!  You both are real pals!

One of the problems I've had, and I don't know if anyone else has had problems like this, is that the people attacking me feed into my delusions.  For instance, I have a recurring voice that says, "You can't even prove two lines parallel."  (Yes I can.)  Then they said, the psychotronic people, "She can do complex equations and you can't."  (I had a higher math score than her on the test, so...)  I was hearing voices pretty badly, and they could have, at any time, just done one lobotomy, but they continued to harass and stalk me, and my lobotomy was botched on top of the fact I was attacked.  How I have any brain function is a miracle.

The female who works on me is about as smart as a rock. I'm not saying I'm real bright, but she isn't a shooting star either.

The male who works on me is a psychopathic and is treating me like some pet rat found by a 12 year old boy.  The two of them are constantly fighting (I hear their relays in my sleep) about what to do.  The female is more caring and cautious and the male needs a new job.

The idea of a perfect society is a dangerous one but no less real in modern culture.  A select group of people will always take it upon themselves to exert their influence on others hoping to bring forth a model society based off of personal philosophy--as if it's limpid to the individual, but we shouldn't be overly worried.  After all, reality has to be a certain way.  A doesn't go to B without logic.  They can't use psychotronic weapons on us all or they wouldn't have a workforce.  While they're turning some of us into zombies in their epic campaign of pure stupidity, the herd will remain untouched and many of these advances will slowly yoke with society to create a better world. 

We'll get past this.  Yes, all of us.  They will advance in such a way that they'll have to fix what the others have done.  We'll get out of our closets one day, or wherever they've chased us to, and be... productive.

I'm sorry to everyone else who is suffering out there, but we're just the unlucky few.  I laugh at them these days because I know their cause is pointless, their emotional appeals meaningless and their intents ignoble.

You'd think they'd try to fix their own sordid souls first.  Most are just trying to ingratiate superiors with their petty deeds, pathetic sycophants.