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email: cubicle227 at yahoo . ca - you can send me an email any time for any reason.

They are probably in the process of programming me for suicide, very slowly.

I thought it would be good for me to write an article about how they programmed me for suicide, at sunnybrook hospital. I am tired, but I will try my best.

Firstly, I believe I was probably triggered to come extremely close to it (knife on my skin) before I was taken to sunnybrook hospital. Once there, I was continuously forced not to resist psychological torture until I began to imagine running into a large food heater, sometimes trying to commit suicide, sometimes trying to escape the hospital. I was made to become secretly attracted to the idea of turning myself into liquid. I would go toward the source of fetishized suffering related to this when I drank alcohol later on.

In the hospital, a staff member often clicked a pen and I was programmed to become more and more triggered by this, to commit suicide. Then the idea of having my body forcefully moved toward the electrical socket became a problem. I imagined my distance from the socket to happen in "steps" related to disobedience.

Continuously, I was forced to imagine things like pouring acid on myself, putting myself into the heater, electrocuting myself or gouging my eyes. They made me insane and blamed it on my psychosis.

Love, Daniel

email: cubicle227 at yahoo . ca - you can contact me any time for any reason.

Introduction:

I was in Muskoka with my dad in late august of this year. We stayed at Deerhurst Resort in Ontario, Canada.

During my stay, I went horseback riding. When the horses were pulled out of their stable, I already saw something akin to depression or unhappiness in them, particularly in their eyes.

During the ride, the instructor told me, "I want you to not worry at all about hurting it. Kick it in its sides as hard as you can." Then, "Your goal is to not let it eat (grass, plants or leaves)."

We were also supposed to harshly pull its head to the side we wanted it to move in. At one point we were supposed to keep it from moving.

The instructor told us the horses weren't supposed to eat leaves because it was a choking hazard, but admitted she had never seen any of them choke. She did say to a horse, "you don't deserve it anyway" regarding leaf-eating. By the end, my horse lashed out a bit at that woman.

How exactly are these horses mind-controlled?

My own mind control, as well as that of others I know about, involves being prevented from eating normally (being forced to eat certain amounts of certain foods) during key programming periods. Like the horses being kicked and having their heads pulled harshly, I often receive little nudges and kick-like sensations, as well as forced movements, like my head moving to one side, the primary purpose being to alter my behaviour and thinking, action by action and thought by thought. The difference is that the horses' perps (harassers) are its riders, not just some secret authority.

The horses are kicked harder and harder until they move from pain or discomfort.

Less important information:

When I went horseback riding in Costa Rica, we treated the horses much more nicely, even giving them pineapple when we had stopped. It may also be worth mentioning these horses were constantly twitching near their necks. It could've been a bug. It could also be a triggered itch, as is the case with me. I, too, suspected I may have had bed bugs before it became obvious that something else was going on.

According to the instructor, the horses didn't feel anything unless we really kicked them. I have evidence to the contrary: it moved specifically when I kicked it gently, at first.

Over time, it became more tired and decided not to obey the signals.

Disobedience isn't the same as lack of awareness.

This post is the least I could do to try to help the horses in some way.

Love, Daniel

email: cubicle227 at yahoo . ca (you can contact me any time for any reason)

This is a mind control (symptoms) log I will update frequently.

Here, I will try to post symptoms I am currently experiencing caused by the mind control, and related experiences. These are suspicions at the least, facts at best.

I hope to update this post about once every day or few days. I was inspired by Martti Koski who did something similar. Another victim who spoke to me by phone also recommended I write about it each day.

I lost a log I was keeping from a few weeks ago.

"They" usually means the people or beings who are secretly trying to enslave and robotize me.

For more information on how mind control has affected my life and how it began, you can read this blog post:

https://peacepink.ning.com/profiles/blogs/my-life-mind-control-and-psychosis-constant-abuse?xg_source=activity

Sunday, August 10, 2014

They tell me to "remove internet posts about mind control, immediately/completely" through text that briefly appears or "flashes" in my vision.

(May be induced directly or as a learned reaction to thoughts about my posts, from past indoctrination)

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

They close my jaw onto harder foods so as to cause me pain when I eat, which makes me angry and want to use ketamine (teeth are sensitive from dental procedure).

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

They jolt my arms to cause painful collisions when I move close to objects.

They greatly reduced a feeling of joy when I was with a friend, by making my throat muscle "click" in a way I'm trained to react strongly to.

They made me stay in place when I was thinking of moving, by triggering a "drooling" hallucination that grounds me and blocks thoughts about how I will move away.

Thursday, August 14, 2014

They can force me to make simple sounds with my voice, but not full words.

Friday, August 15, 2014

Had a dream related to my hospital-induced trauma, in which parts seemed artificially induced in one way or another: a childish voice telling me "Some people will stay and some will die, but it doesn't matter because one day you'll be the only one left" (similar to what produced delusions about being forced to live forever and being alone on earth when they triggered my psychotic episode). Also, being mocked in the dream when realizing the skull I see (in real life) is related to the damage my psyche endured during one night in the hospital kitchen.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

As is usual, tiny burp-like "clicks" keep me thinking about drugs (and sometimes psychosis, trauma, etc.) in a crude, essentially unimportant way.

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Especially this evening, They are using the tactile hallucinations I'm programmed to react to, to make me think in a more self-centered, subjective, uncreative way. While I wrote this, they symbolized my neck being cut. Every day, they irritate me (emotionally) when I decide to do something (i.e. drink some water). Through this, they are probably reducing my motivation to do things by will, and may be preparing me for another catatonic episode.

Monday, August 18, 2014

They directly made me say "hell" and "yeah/ya,"

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Through the tactile hallucinations they induce, they have been limiting my range of thought to here and now, inhibiting my ability to recall memories or think about things which are not directly present. And even then they try to stop the thoughts.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

According to them, they work for the CSIS, and indicate they are telling me the truth. They also communicate that my amygdala is greatly damaged. My own mind can see the link between one of the nights in the sunnybrook hospital kitchen and (perhaps) permanent over-activation of my amygdala or part of my brain stem. It's a suspicion.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

They sometimes (only slight today) gradually oversensitize me to hums from machines, which they overload me with when I am vulnerable. Too much mechanical energy. This doesn`t happen much anymore.

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Constant suppression of thoughts as usual, resulting in uncreative and repetitive thoughts about drugs. Thinking creatively about a spiritual, psychedelic reality when I could gave me hope and made me more resistant to their itch torture.

Sunday+Monday, August 24+25, 2014

Constant thought suppression through mini burps and drooling hallucinations

Tuesday, August 26, 2014?

They use itch hallucinations across the Inside of my knees and elbows, which can make me think of bone-breaking. They also mimic a painless version of a needle going through my inner elbow.

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Itches on inner knee when I changed my position or felt comfortable during the night.

For months, I`ve noticed synchrony between my thoughts and actions, and people coughing or honking in their car. It may be used as a way to discourage such actions. This can sometimes be noticed in sitcoms, too.

More than a coincidence, I say.

Out of all the writing I did today, the one above is the only one I was discouraged from writing through throat-muscle clicks.

 Saturday, October 18, 2014

 Psychosis started. I used DXM instead of alcohol, and paid the price. Essentially all drugs seem to aid in my tendency to be programmed against my will, but this is partially because I don't use them when I desire, but rather during moments of anger or even panic.

It is essentially about being given knowledge by "aliens," having them force me to believe they were never here or that it is my own delusion, etc. By giving the universe an idea as to all of my desires, I may also have knowingly and wrongly informed it about myself.

Apparently this psychosis will be painful (as were the other two episodes) and I have tried to warn the universe of the severe consequences. It seems to have tried to warn me, too.

Love, Daniel. And hopefully, I will not be too much more of a robot after this.